Friday, October 31, 2008

Last post for now

I'm running out of steam. I'm actually surprised I had enough steam to post what I did. My life has been a series of huge ups & downs lately. Without going into everything, I've been dealing with some postpartum "stuff." Call it whatever, baby blues, depression, "psycho-ness"...I've got it.

I didn't feel this way with Zachary, & I know that this is more than just the typical "moving from 1 kid to 2" stuff, either. I feel very out of control emotionally most of the time. Thankfully I have some great friends & prayer support right now. My sweet hubby is helping when he can.

I spoke in a little more detail about what I've been going through at my moms group this Tuesday. Things had been going really well for about a week at that point. Wouldn't you know, as soon as I spoke out in obedience to what the Lord wanted me to say, my life took one of those drastic downward slides. We're talking huge rollercoasters here.

I'm saying all this to say, well, I guess I'm not sure what I'm trying to say. Somehow I feel like just saying it is enough right now. Last night I shared with Marc how I was feeling. He was gracious enough to give up some of his precious sleep to let me sleep. I actually slept 4 hours straight last night. Blissful. And, it appears that God knew I needed that. He saw what was coming today.

Zachary has this fear of airplanes right now. Not so much the airplane itself but the loud booming noises they make. Which, in itself isn't a huge problem, but we live close to a main road where there are lots of motorcycles & semis, as well as a train that passes by about 8 times a day. He has been freaking out at every little noise, barely sleeping. He was so cranky today and whiny. I thought it was just the fear thing happening again (because it was that, too), but it appears he has a stomach virus. (which of course doesn't show itself until 11 pm...is there any kid who actually gets sick in the middle of the day when you don't expect to sleep anyway?)

Sweet boy, he is resting well now. He asked me for a snack a few minutes after. I don't think so, kid. :) I've been spending a few minutes catching up on my computer time, waiting for Kenna to wake up & nurse. Of course, this will probably be "the night" she sleeps more than 4 hours and I'm missing it! Sigh.

Oh, and if you don't read anything else I post in the next few days (and you're a mom of young children), READ THIS post (tips for making it through the day without going insane). It totally ministered to me today. (Thanks to Money Saving Mom for posting it originally).

Well, looks like she's up, so I'm gonna go. She made it a little over 4 hours...we're getting somewhere! I have a date with my bed this weekend, and we're going to spend 6 heavenly hours getting to know each other again. :)

1 comment:

Stephanie said...

Praying for you, girl. Please let me know if there is anything else that I can do for you. Hudson is going to need some play time to get his mind off the insanity of having a newborn in the house - please let Zachary come over and play one day! I will keep in touch about that..... If you ever get a chance to call or email when you need some extra prayer, too, I would love to be lifting you up even more specifically